I remember the excitement when the phone call came. “We just have to finalize it, but you can schedule that moving truck,” the Midwestern man’s voice exclaimed. Expectantly, we did.
We waited.
But the paperwork never arrived. Weeks later, the same voice apologized on the phone. Unforeseen circumstances arose. The position was canceled. We’re weren’t moving to Iowa. We were moving, though… we had to.
We waited.
Living out of suitcases at my in-laws’ house, we sought work.
We waited.
My husband showed me a job listing. It wasn’t what was expected. We knew one person in the whole region. But the Lord said yes with perfect clarity and abundant confirmation. One Skype interview and a phone offer later, we were scheduling another moving truck. This one was bound for the unknown of Minnesota.
With just two weeks to prepare and little in the bank, we signed a lease online with high hopes.
We’d waited.
The Lord had made the way. We believed it.
…Then we pulled up to the apartment complex.
Signing paperwork, we discovered they changed the lease from what we originally signed. Shrugging, the woman said “well, yes, it’s more expensive than you agreed to. But you just moved across the country. What can you do?” The deceit stung.
Our lease was canceled. Tired of waiting, my prayer was “Lord, you brought us here. Why??”
In a new state, 24 hours away from home, we drove to a storage unit. We moved all our stuff into a 6-foot cement prison. On that October day, the first snowfall drifted down. We stayed with a friend for a whole homeless week, searching frantically.
We waited.
The Lord provided a place to live within a chaotic week. But not a good job for me. We waited through church challenges, friendlessness, and open opposition at my part-time job.
My prayer?
“Lord you brought us here. Why?”
I wasn’t ungrateful. I’ve lived much worse.
But never had the Lord so clearly made a way where there was no way, only to bring me to something I couldn’t make sense of.
[bctt tweet=”Has God ever made a way where there was no way, only to bring you to something you couldn’t make sense of?” username=”PatHolbrook @BethanyMcIlrath”]
Exodus became more personal to me. We’d just left a harder chapter of life. We’d just faced promise after promise of newness, waiting until the Lord said “go.” He parted some unbelievable waters for us and led us through on dry land.
When we arrived, the land stayed metaphorically dry and literally frozen. Life felt parched and biting.
I spent much of my time grumbling like the Israelites in the desert: “now you have brought us into this wilderness to starve us all to death” (Exodus 16:3.)
God, in fact, had different purposes.
Since our Minnesota wilderness waiting season, the Lord has reminded me of the “whys” I was too discontent to notice then.
[bctt tweet=”It was in our waiting we learned firsthand about how God gives peace when our circumstances are intimidating.” username=”PatHolbrook @BethanyMcIlrath”]
It was in our waiting we learned firsthand about how God gives peace when our circumstances are intimidating. We’ll never forget how He parted the way and the assurance we had, even as I grumbled, that He was with us and leading us.
We learned an awful lot about prayer. Our marriage grew immensely while knowing no one but each other. We eventually met amazing people.
While in Minnesota, we were blessed by the Lord’s provision through miraculous financing, too-coincidental of timing, unexpected gifts, and even the car we are driving today. My husband and I had time with his best friend we never would have if we didn’t live close.
I also learned about the blessing of loneliness. I learned what it is to wake up to mundane circumstances and immediately turn to the Lord. It was in Minnesota God taught me to write my first manuscript and challenged me to read His whole Word for the first time.
It was there I began to make memories with the Lord. It was there I learned the sound of His voice.
I still pray that prayer though- just a little revised.
“Lord, you brought us here. You know why.”
I pray it even when our circumstances seem settled.
Because I know while we’re waiting on God, He’s always both bringing us out and drawing us in.
How has God answered your prayers in new situations or times of loneliness?
{A version of this post was originally published here.}
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[bctt tweet=”LINKUP is open! This week, my friend @BethanyMcIlrath encourages us to remember that we may not know why God allows hard circumstances, but He does. And that should be enough. Join us?” username=”PatHolbrook”]
I appreciate your testimony. Several years ago it seemed that God was leading us to another state. It turned out not to be a great experience, and we puzzled over why God had us there for those years. We still don’t know. 🙂 But we trust He does.
Thanks for sharing that Barbara, and for the encouragement that you trust God knows even as you still don’t! Amen!
He does know why, and some day I hope I get to sit down with you over coffee and talk about our stories, because we also have just come through a tunnel of questions and wondering about the ways of God. Deliverance has come and the questions remain, but we know his heart, so we hold our questions in faith.
Oh Michele, I hope we get to do that, too. If you’re ever in the Carolinas, please let me know!! I’m sorry for the tunnel of questions you’ve just faced and pray God strengthens your hands as you hold the questions and reminds you daily of His heart!
“It was there I began to make memories with the Lord. It was there I learned the sound of His voice.” Oh Bethany, I’m crying as I read this. Reading about this season of your life makes me even more happy for where you are now. God knew. God knows. We can trust Him. Hugs, friend.
Lois, I thank God for you! Thanks for sharing in the uncertainty, struggles, and the joy just the same. We can trust Him who knows everything! Amen. Hugs back, friend!
This is a beautiful testimony, Bethany. It’s hard to appreciate wandering through the wilderness when we’re in it. I love your conclusion that the Lord is “always both bringing us out and drawing us in.” It’s a lesson we all can take with us today.
Thank you, Lisa. It’s hard to appreciate in the moment, but this post is from a few years ago and I’m just extra appreciative now that I can look back and see His faithfulness more fully. May He draw you out and bring you in today!
“Lord, you brought me here. You know why.” I’ll be using your revised prayer in my current situation. He knows why and his “why” is always for my good. Thank you.
Amen, Yvonne. I just prayed for you and your current “why” situation, trusting He knows it fully!
Thanks for sharing your story and your heart, Bethany. That sounds tough and we’ve made some hard moves before where we felt friendless and even hopeless. Then God not only parted seas, sent daily mana, moved mountains and worked behind the scenes…all in His timing, but He had us wait so we’d rely on Him for everything.
Thank you, Karen! Praise Him for how He has moved and cared for you too!
Bethany, I can relate to your story in many ways. The Lord has taken us on such journeys where we left full of excitement only to meet pain and loss. But through those times, my husband and I also grew closer to each other and to the Lord. I believe those are sanctifying experiences. Ones I wouldn’t have missed for the world but hope I never have to repeat!
Amen and amen, Debbie. I remember some such stories from your heroes of the faith Bible study, they so encouraged me!
Thank you for this consoling, encouraging blog today and thank you to the mini bloggers in the comment section. I am sincerely grateful for your words. Amen.
Aren’t the mini bloggers in the comments treasures? I love these testimonies too. Praise God, and thank you for your encouragement!